Described approving (and/or deleting) comments cannot be resolved in a tricky way. It requires small piece of architecture (really small piece, but architecture). Luckily, the way that Jot stores the comments in a database gives all prerequisites to build such architecture.
A website needs to have special page for handling remote requests that will be arriving in the result of clicking a link in an email notification. On such a page should work request processor (snippet/small php application) that reads/verifies/validates requests and depending on the result of a check performs the requested action or drops a request.
The link sent in an notification email should be built something like:
http://yourdomain.com/yourprocessorpage?comid=...&sechash=...&action=...
where "comid" is an id of the comment to be published and "sechash" is a secure hash -- 32-characters unique value build by Jot for each comment and kept in a database along with the comment itself; this value will serve as a request validator; "action" is a "publish/delete/unpublish/whatever".
If you are fluent enough in php and database stuff, you can build this on your own. If not -- you can post it into "Commercial Inquiries & Bounties" thus giving an opportunity for guys looking there for their piece of bread
