Oh boy!
This has become confusing for you I think.
First of all, if you have no PHP MySQL experience at all then MODx is probably not the CMS for you yet. All CMSs (with a couple of exceptions) use a database of one kind or another.
Second, installing MODx on a remote server just requires that your host meets the requirements of PHP 4.2.X and MySQL 4.X installed. You need to be able to upload files to your server via ftp (using an FTP application like
FileZilla or
SmartFTP) or some type of filemanager (don’t use Dreamweaver’s FTP for this as it is like pushing a golf ball through a watering hose. )
You would be the person installing MODx yourself.
There are
instructions on installation on the Documentation pages as well as on the
Wiki. You will need to set up a MySQL DB (through PHPMyAdmin or some other GUI) or have your host set up an empty database and give you the username, password and path. You will need this to configure MODx for setup.
Some hosting providers use automatic installers that can install some common CMSs such as Drupal, Joomla or Wordpress. None of these are at all like MODx but if you haven’t gotten your feet wet at all and you can’t manually install the application yourself this may be a way to go. Check your hosting control panel to see if they use automatic installers. I also get the impression that your host is not helpful. Most big hosting companies will install third party applications that don’t need root access as long as your willing to pay for their time. I might shop around for a host.
Personally I would download and install XAMPP and play with it on your desktop and see that it is fairly easy to learn (not so easy to master but that is the fun of it.)
Cheers and all the best,
Jay